a new beginning

[909am] Since 2006 I was blessed to be able to stay home with my son. Anyone who normally has a child goes back into the working world within a matter of weeks but for me it was different. On a beautiful day the 18th of Septemeber my son came into this world. He didn't come into the world a fat healthy little baby but a baby maybe the size of a nice juicy steak as my Aunt Clo would say. May she rest in peace, she was taken to heaven yesterday :'( but she's in a better place.

He was hooked up to everything you could possibly imagine. They told me he wouldn't have his eyes open or make a sound. Being born at 30 weeks vs the regular full term 40 weeks he came out peeing on the doctor and he looked me right in the eyes with his big beautiful brown eyes. He needed all the care and attention he could get. He only weighed 2lbs 2oz and right some that moment he came out as a fighter.

The first days of his life were spent in the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit). He was hooked up to breathing machines, had to be fed by a tube, he had jondus, he even had some pretty extensive surgery. All the days and nights I spent there I prayed for my little man. But sometimes it was so hard to keep a strong heart because all around me parents were crying because their babies couldn't hold on any longer. But I was blessed and my little man came home somewhat great he just needed a bit of help with an oxygen tank. That didn't last long though because he made it quite clear to me and his dad Estaban when he pulled it out one day during the whole ride out. AMAZING!

Because of what I had and the amazing boyfriend/father I was able to stay home and give my little man the one on one that he needed and then some. Spending time with him is amazing and not having to force him to daycare at such a young age made me so happy. Some people ridicule those who get supported by their significant others but if they knew how much they were helping their child they would do the same. Or maybe if their situation was different and they had that amazing support as I do they would do the same. I am an educated smart woman and I will do what I have to do for my son and staying home is what I chose. He knows the meanig of family because of that such much more than maybe another little boy or girl might. So don't be so quick to pass judgement but look at the better part to being able to be a stay at home mom.

Well now my little man is healthy and happy and about to start school and because of that its time for me to start going out into the working world. Hoping for jobs but at the same time a bit nervous. I did dabble in seasonal this past 2009, F that jobs bunch of asses lmao.
So today I contine to make that journey to work. Do I need to? No I really don't because Estaban made it clear that I don't need to (love you <3). Question is, do I want to? Yes I do because I have to contiune to strive for my goals and thats to continue school and become Dr.Jacqueline Newton! [ill no longer be Jacobs by the time that happens :o)]

WISH ME LUCK READERS although its just a few for now. And comment away if you wish I have set it to where anyone can comment. Be nice as I am with what you have to say!